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100 Percent Laughs
glo_1113Date: Friday, 29 August 2008, 1:05:55 AM | Message # 1
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The Honeymoon

A couple was on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."

The husband replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."

The wife continues, "Yeah, I've been with one guy."

"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"

"Liger Woods."

"Liger Woods, the golfer?"

"Yeah."

"Well, he's rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."

The husband and wife then make passionate love.

When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.

"What are you doing?" asks the wife.

The husband says, "I'm hungry, I was going to call room service and get something to eat."

"Liger wouldn't do that."

"Oh yeah? What would Liger do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."

The husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make love a second time.

When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone. "Now what are you doing?" she asks.

The husband says, "I'm still hungry so I was going to get room service to get something to eat."

"Liger wouldn't do that."

"Oh yeah? What would Liger do?"

"He'd come back to bed and do it again."

The guy slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love one more time.

When they finish he's tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.

The wife asks, "Are you calling room service?"

"No! I'm calling Liger Woods, to find out what the par is for this darn hole."

Added (29 August 2008, 1:05:55 Am)
---------------------------------------------
WRONG NUMBER

A man joins a big corporate empire as a trainee.
On his very first day of work, he dials the pantry and shouts into the phone - "Get me a coffee, quickly!"

The voice from the other side responded, "You fool you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to, dumbo?"

"No," replied the trainee.
"It's the CEO of the company, you fool!"

The trainee shouts back, "And do YOU know who YOU are talking to, you fool?!"
"No." replied the CEO indignantly.

"Good!" replied the trainee, and puts down the phone.


this is my rule.........
 
KattyBooDate: Friday, 29 August 2008, 9:51:20 AM | Message # 2
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well i love the Wrong Number joke.. hahahahaha tongue

funny!! biggrin


Happy Kattybooing!
 
ts_aierDate: Monday, 01 September 2008, 2:53:38 PM | Message # 3
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A man in US sees a dog, abt 2 bite a lady. He kicks d dog 2 death.................
A reporter wrote: US Citizen saves lady frm dog!!!!!!!!
the man says: im not US citizen....
so Report changd: Foreign hero saves lady frm dog!
the man says: Actualy, im frm Pakistan...
next day Headlines: TERRORIST ATTACKS LOCAL DOG!!!!!
.................................................................................................................................. ............................................

During war, enemy soldier captures 2 nuns n says: i wnt revenge, so i'll Rape u all..
young nun: plz spare d older nun.....
older nun: shut up!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAR IS WAR....

 
KattyBooDate: Monday, 01 September 2008, 5:00:20 PM | Message # 4
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war is war???
hahaha lol
the older nun wants to............ gossip


Happy Kattybooing!
 
glo_1113Date: Monday, 13 October 2008, 8:09:16 PM | Message # 5
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Today's Professional Management FUNDAS

1."We will do it" means "You will do it"

2."You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you"

3."We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same"

4."Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done "At least not tomorrow!"

5."After discussion we will decide-I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

6."There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied"

7."Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later"

8."We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time"

9."We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

10."We had slight differences of opinion "means "We had actually fought"

11."Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

12."You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

13."We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is"

14."Well Family is important; your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected," means, "Well you know..."

15."We are a team," means, "I am not the only one to be blamed"

16."That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it"

17."All the Best" means "You are in trouble"


this is my rule.........
 
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